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It's 5am and Terry is in the bedroom snoring away.  Lord but that man can snore!
But guess what?  So can I and he loves me anyway :-)

I never used to snore.  They say that the longer people are together the more alike that are.  He intermittently has a goatee and so do I but I pluck mine on a regular basis.  I never used to drink coffee [Sharron?  That resolution of giving it up is looong abandoned and I'm a better person for it] and he never used to but cream in his.  I have a bad habit of leaving straw wrappers in my car and his has a bad habit of vaccuming the middle of the room and not the edges - we're working that stuff out.  Much to my mortification Terry is [and I quote him] 'an agitating asshole' - if he knows what gets under your skin he is going to use it.  Like winning at the casino. He has been known to add a zero.  Or 2.  Or losing at the casino.  He's been known to add a zero.  Or 2.  JUST to get under their skin.  Or calling his brother in Illinois from the patio where he is drinking coffee in shorts when he knows he brother is shoveling snow.  Just because he can.  I tend to avoid those subjects unless I really really don't like you and I come off sounding like a bitch [because frankly I am at that point].  Terry?  He comes off the nice guy that he is.

This MS thing bit us both in the butt and we deal with it in different ways.  I'm a talker and Terry is not. We saw a show in Vegas - Defending the Caveman - and man was it true for us.  According to that comedian women are gatherers and men hunters. . If women are at a party and the chip bowl is empty odds are that at least a couple of them will address it  and take care of the empty bowl.  The comedian jokes that they will probably hold hands and birds sing during the process, tying little bows in their hair. Men will argue about who brought the chips, whose bowl it is and who filled it last time. It may take an hour to get the chip bowl filled.   Women bond by sharing information.  Men tend to talk about a common task.  Women use about 10,000 words a day and men around 2,000 a day.  For us that's about right.  I wasn't quite sure how to take his silence when I  shared deep stuff.  Did he hear me?  Did it not matter?  Did I not matter? 

We laugh that we've become that old couple that shares a meal when we go out.  We split a meal and an appetizer.  He likes the cheddar fries with a lot of cheese but I prefer the ones around the edge with just a bit.  He likes that catsup and I snag the ranch dressing for the fries.  Last night he got the prime rib sliders with a side salad .  I got the salad  :-) 

I'm tired of the pain this MS is causing but I'm really tired of how it dictates what he and I can do.  It makes me sad to see the sadness in his eyes and that I know he feels helpless to help me.  I feel helpless to help him.
But he does help .me  In so many ways.
He doesn't complain when I ask if we can watch TV 'in the other room' even though he knows I'm just going to fall asleep.  He doesn't complain that I fall asleep at 8pm and then struggle to fall back asleep at 2am.  While getting this infusion my metabolism is all screwed up.  I'm hungry but nauseous and the weight melts off - 3 lbs yesterday.  He makes sure I have something cold to drink by my chair. My breath would peel wallpaper and he still kisses my cheek.  My blood sugar reads 'high', I pee every 20 min and he never complains when he has to pause the movie.  He turns on the fan for me and covers himself with an afghan. And then throws an afghan over my feet because he sees that they are cold.  Pulls down the blind when he sees the sun is shining in my face.  Offers to drive. Doesn't complain that it's take out  .  .again.

He encourages me to stay positive and just tackle today. 
He still makes me crazy,  Still slides stuff into drawers that I spend hours trying to find.  Still hangs his tshirts and throws mine in the dryer.  Still doesn't separate darks and whites.  Still plows ahead in crowds and leaves me to bob and weave to catch up with him.  Still dominates the channel changer.

I love him with all my heart and couldn't get thru this without him.